Just wanted to update everyone before the long memorial day weekend...So I just returned from NYC and this is probably my last visit since my tooth work is all complete. I have a permanent crown replaced. It was so good to see my parents once again.
My parents and I went to Motherhood Maternity store and I bought comfortable bottoms for the next few months since I won't be coming back to shop for clothes anymore. The hot weather gave me all the more reason to shop for shorts and skirts. Thank goodness the gift card from my sister-in-law came in handy. I purchased a support belt which helped me feel secure whenever I went out. (click on support belt to see which one I bought if you're curious.)
There was alot of traffic on the way back from ny to boston for some reason. I just made it in time for our women's bible study group held at my house. We were dying in heat even with the AC on. But the prayer and support was much needed especially because I missed my routine dr's appt. on Mon. The next day before I headed out to the hospital I said a quick prayer. For some reason because of the natural anxiety and fears of this pregnancy, I've grown closer to God. And when I lifted up a prayer for protection for my lil' girl, I also asked God to watch over my lil' Jacob. I realized that God gave up his 1 and only son Jesus to die for us for a purpose. And for some reason... I had told God I understand how much that must hurt because I felt I sacrificed my son too. Through the loss, I realized Jacob has touched many lives around us for the better. And even though it was a difficult journey, we all learned something. I remembered my husband telling me that Jacob taught him to be a better father. I learned to help those close around me through their loss and struggles. My father-in-law became Catholic and started going to church. My parents have always been devout Christians and fervent in prayer. Even the little support I get from my family and friends have meant so much.
Well, en route to Boston I received a call from the nurse to call back immediately. When I did, they discovered 2 bulging fluid-sacs emerging from my baby girl's brain. They called it Choroid Plexus Cyst (CPC) and mentioned it may lead to Trisomy 18. I was in shock but the nurse told me most likely it will go away in the 3rd trimester and is very common. After reading babyzone.com I felt somewhat relieved but still disturbed because of the finding in my 18 wk. u/s. 99.7% pregnant mothers tend to find this in their 18 wk u/s. So, maternal fetal medicine took their routine u/s and said we'll schedule you in 2 weeks for a followup. I said, "wait...that's it? what about the choroid plexus cyst?" The tech brought in the director of maternal fetal medicine and he examined me again. He mentioned in the last u/s they didn't find it. It must have been in the 19 wk u/s taken from obgyn? He also mentioned that if I had one and disappeared, there's still a chance that it could lead to trisomy 18 even if the cpc went away. So he examined the baby's heart, feet and hand very carefully. I was getting nervous because he kept looking at her hand. He said one of the symptoms is a clenched fist. I asked if it was normal for a baby's hand to be closed. It is normal but we're waiting for her hand to reopen again. He pushed my belly a couple of times and it opened. Thank goodness! I was in the clear. No cpc's, no signs of trisomy 18. The chances of having one would be 1/200. What a relief! I truly believe in prayer and that God is watching out for my little one.
Now that I'm able to breathe again, I'm clearing out everything in the home office and making it into a baby room. I'm able to plan our baby shower with a close friend and start planning our registry. I'm trying my best to focus on optimistic thoughts and all this planning is helping my mind become preoccupied with "happy thoughts!" I'm so excited because I finally found a theme for the baby girl's room. (i'll post more on this sometime next week).
This weekend we're going to celebrate memorial day weekend in Gloucester, MA and in the evening we've invited friends for a bbq. I hope to post up pictures.
Thanks for listening and I wish everyone a wonderful, relaxing weekend!
Janet! Did I get this right that you were concerned for 1-2 weeks, waiting for the results? Not to yell at you or anything...but in the future, please share these prayer concerns with us (at least over email, if not in the blog) so that we can pray for you and your baby girl as well! Okay, I'm done "yelling". But please know that I'm here for you and praying for you. I feel that God has definitely strengthened my relationship with him as well through our losses. Sometimes I think "wow...it took three losses for me to truly rely on Him...why did it take so long for me to come around?" Although the losses are still painful, I can recognize the work that He has done in my life. Take care!
ReplyDeleteWow I am so sorry that you had to deal with such an amazingly scary situation!! I was reading with such trepidation just praying that the next sentence was that everything was ok. If that's how I felt, I can't imagine what it was like for you to go through it.
ReplyDeleteI completely understand your stronger relationship with God. It really is amazing how He makes us stronger when we are at our weakest. You really are doing an amazing job and are an inspiration.